I am Jia Dongjin in the Siheyuan (Courtyard House)

Chapter 68 Startling

"Rain, are you crazy? What nonsense are you talking about?"

He was shocked to hear his sister’s words. It took him a lot of effort to regain his elder brother’s authority and start to scold He Yushui.

"Brother, I know what you're thinking. She's never liked you, so this is your only chance. If you sincerely go to her door to ask for her hand in marriage, I'm 70% confident that it will work out."

"No, this won't do, it's impossible! How could I marry a widow? I didn't even fancy her. Have you lost your mind? Besides, her family is in chaos right now, how could this happen?"

"You're such a fool, bro!"

He Yuzhu's words made sense, leaving He Yushui with no room for argument, especially since it was just a fleeting thought of hers.

After letting go, He Yushui slumped down, a feeling of helplessness filling her entire body.

"Rain, I know she's a good wife, but I don't want to marry her. With the rationing being reduced, raising two children won't be easy. Even Liu Hong, a cadre, doesn't dare to raise them."

"Silly brother, stop talking. Happiness is something you have to fight for yourself. Just based on that statement, you're not good enough for her."

Since it has already happened, why bother saying "why bother" again?

"At crucial moments, you have to rely on yourself to fight for it!"

He Yushui remembered what he had said. After thinking about it, she returned to the side room, took a good bath, and changed into her best clothes.

Facing the mirror in front of the bed, He Yushui began to comb her hair. Looking at her youthful and pretty face in the mirror, she slowly untangled her braided hair and tied it into a ponytail. Later, she closed her eyes and untied the ponytail, letting her long hair fall over her shoulders.

He Yushui opened her eyes, and the mirror showed the image of a beautiful young woman, her youthful innocence replaced by a hazy, dreamlike quality.

"Rain, you're a grown woman now. If you like something, just do it. You can do it. He likes you too, and he even looked at you like that. Happiness is something you have to fight for. Waiting passively is no different from being a coward."

He Yushui murmured to herself in front of the mirror. Even though she couldn't count on her brother and her father was far away in Baoding, she still made a decision with her fists clenched.

Since someone stopped joking with her and began avoiding contact with her, He Yushui knew that the Yellow River was gone forever. Fortunately, Qin Jingru was also young and had returned to Qin Family Village due to the food shortage.

However, the rumors grew stronger and stronger, and Qin Huairu was rescued by Jia Dongjin. The situation changed dramatically in an instant, no longer as it had been, which gave her a bad feeling, fearing that Jia Dongjin and Qin Huairu would get together.

After dressing up briefly, He Yushui went to the front yard's back house, knocked on the door, and then locked it.

"Rain, your writing has improved a lot. I have nothing to say. You'd be better off reading more newspapers."

Jia Dongjin was reading a book, a notebook taken by a university professor. He had found it by chance at a scrap metal yard, and it contained many interesting insights into life.

For example, desire is the driving force behind action: whether it is the need for survival, the pursuit of material things, or spiritual transcendence, all proactive behavior stems from some kind of "wanting"—wanting to be better, more, and more profound. As Kant said, desire is "man's natural endowment," driving the progress of civilization in agriculture, technology, art, and other fields.

"Dissatisfaction" fuels innovation: discontent with the status quo prompts humans to explore new paths. The author argues that instincts (such as appetite and sexual desire) are transformed into desires under the catalysis of thought, driving individuals to break through biological limitations.

Desire is the spark of creation; but if one cannot transcend the obsession with desire, one will eventually be trapped in its cycle, falling into the paradox of "gaining means losing".

True freedom lies not in eliminating desires, but in consciously harnessing them.

As the Tao Te Ching says, "Too much leads to confusion, too little leads to understanding."

"This teacher is talented, what a pity!"

Jia Dongjin was engrossed in reading when He Yushui entered the back room with the book. Jia Dongjin was taken aback when he saw He Yushui locking the door.

Ignoring Jia Dongjin's words, He Yushui's heart was pounding in her chest. She sat on the stool next to Jia Dongjin and smoothed her long hair, which she had deliberately let down.

She consulted with her classmate Yu Haitang, who said that long, flowing hair makes one look more mature than braids.

Under the lights, the girl, contrary to her youthful innocence, appeared sweet and charming. He Yushui's shy and timid demeanor made Jia Dongjin gasp. His throat tightened and his mouth went dry, and he immediately knew that the newcomer was up to no good.

"Eastward march, that's me,"

After a long silence, He Yushui took a deep breath, looked intently at Jia Dongjin, and said in a voice as soft as a mosquito's buzz, but with a do-or-die courage, "I was born in January, so I'm actually 16 years old. I'll graduate in two years, so I don't have to wait that long."

After saying this, He Yushui nervously closed her eyes, her eyelashes trembling uncontrollably. The only sound in the air was her own heart pounding like a drum.

"The most tender thing is that lowered head, like a lotus flower, shyly trembling in the cool breeze."

He Yushui was extremely shy. Afraid that the man wouldn't see her, she tried her best to turn her flushed face towards Jia Dongjin, towards the man she loved, showing her shyness as if she were at his mercy.

In an instant, He Yushui began to regret her actions. Should she have been more impulsive? Should she have kept it to herself and at least remained friends?

He Yushui had waited so long that she thought love had finally arrived, because a warm hand covered her head and gently rubbed it.

"Silly boy,"

Jia Dongjin laughed heartily, his face beaming with joy. "Great! Yushui is growing into a beautiful young woman, that's wonderful. You should hurry up and get into a vocational school. Then Zhuzi and I will definitely find a way to make sure you get married in style."

He Yushui suddenly opened her eyes. Her face was pale. She opened her mouth as if to say something, but was rendered speechless by a single sentence.

"Rain, you are a good girl. You just like a flower. You don't have to pick it and take it home. You can bloom together with it."

After racking his brains, Jia Dongjin finally remembered a sentence that, although comparing himself to a flower was a bit shameful, conveyed the meaning clearly.

"Eastward march, that's me,"

"Call him Brother Dongjin."

"Brother, it's me,"

"You're too young to understand anything. Remember to call him Brother Dongjin."

Jia Dong's mouth was dry and his tongue parched; he barely managed to maintain his upright character.

After seeing He Yushui off, Jia Dongjin swallowed a large mouthful of saliva.

He wasn't a saint. The young girl had taken a bath before coming, her blond hair had turned black, and she was pure and lovely. Her virgin fragrance was even more intoxicating, making his heart burn with desire.

Fortunately, he had just read a book and knew that he needed to restrain his desires, so Jia Dongjin was able to barely control them and avoid harming himself or others.

If He Yushui were a bit older, if she knew how to use her feminine advantages, if the young girl directly threw herself into his arms and wouldn't let go, Jia Dongjin's lust would be burning fiercely, and he himself didn't believe he could control himself.

Flowers are delivered to his door, so he'll just pick them. He's not afraid of He Yuzhu; at worst, he'll get married in two years. He Yushui is no bad girl; she's a truly wonderful girl.

Of course, Zhang Qin and Qin Huairu were also part of the reason. The two women had already given Jia Dongjin a lot of trouble, and he dared not provoke a third one.

"Stay calm, you must stay calm. The girl is just confused for a moment, it's not that you have any great charm. Learn about eating peanuts and self-discipline."

The young girl He Yushui had caused him a great deal of harm. That night, Jia Dongjin frantically exercised to vent his anger, and finally read "Jin Ping Mei" until late at night before he could barely fall asleep.

What Jia Dongjin didn't know was that as he saw He Yushui off, a pair of deep eyes were fixed on the back room in the dark. If he accepted He Yushui, this person would send him straight to a prison.

"Hmph, you're lucky, kid."

If you don't know, you can do nothing.

When He Yushui was getting ready to go out, someone happened to see her through a gap in the curtains. After realizing something was wrong, the person followed her all the way to the front yard.

Fortunately, Jia Dongjin controlled his desires; otherwise, he would have been doomed and there would have been no chance of survival.

As interests clash and conflicts deepen, the warm and amiable facade of Courtyard No. 95 is torn away, revealing an imminent struggle, even one stained with blood.

The next morning, while jogging to work, Jia Dongjin suddenly had a flash of inspiration. Like He Yushui, a crazy idea also popped into his mind, one that he couldn't help but think about.

I often recall the sunset at the stream pavilion, so intoxicated that I forgot the way home.

Having enjoyed ourselves to the fullest, we returned by boat late, only to find ourselves adrift in the heart of the lotus blossoms.

Struggling to cross, struggling to cross, startling a flock of gulls and egrets.

So far, a fabricated rumor has acted like a depth charge, turning undercurrents into a raging storm.

The bomb was so powerful that even the rumor-monger himself did not expect it. It not only exposed the conflicts within the Jia family, but also laid bare the thoughts between men and women, and subsequently dragged someone into the abyss.

All sorts of people were eager to make their move and could no longer hide their thoughts, whether it was the proud and arrogant Zhang Qin, the deep-thinking Qin Huairu, or the budding He Yushui.

Finally, even Jia Dongjin of the Gou Dao clan was badly injured by the explosion.

Jia Dongjin, who has surfaced, is in the worst position. He is at the center of the conflict, with no way to escape, and is caught in a painful choice.

Having strayed into the heart of the lotus blossoms, Jia Dongjin, like a startled gull, could only rack his brains to decide his course of action.

Since he has descended into madness, Jia Dongjin does not hesitate to use the worst possible malice to speculate about worldly affairs.

"Greetings, you beasts! Bring on the storm! You'll never guess that I've lived two lives, and I don't care about anything."

In the darkness, Jia Dongjin raised his hands to the sky, murmuring as he made his decision, no longer fearing the storms to come.

"Whether it's scorching sun or biting winter cold, I find joy in it, I find joy in it."

From the back room in the front yard, the humming of a young man could be heard.